搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》
搞笑5人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》
　　
演员表：
　　西门吹雪
　　叶孤城
　　花满楼
　　king
　　旁白
　　
道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
　　第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠
　　旁白：A quiet villageiscoveredwithwhitesnow .
　　Birdsaredancinginthecold .
　　Amaniswalkingalongthestreet ,stepbystep .
　　Windiscominginsilence.
　　Another mysteriousmanapproaches .
　　Y与X相遇．
　　X：oH ,Iamsorrytoknockyou !
　　Y:Haha, Nevermindbaybay.
　　X:Excuseme， whoareyouonearth? couldyoutellmeyourname?
　　Y:ha ha ,Iwon’tchangemyname! nomatterwhathappens. I’mthemostfamous-------YeGucheng. Whoareyou?
　　X:Iamximenchuixue.
　　Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?
　　X:Yes,whatiswrong?
　　Y:IheardthatyouarethebestingMartialArts?
　　X:Great, youknowme !
　　Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’tkillme! letmeyougo!
　　X:No, Imustkillyou !
　　Y:Idon''''''''''''''''twanttobekilled.Thereare aeighty-year-oldmotheandathree-yearold sontobelookedafterbyme!
　　X:Noway! Becausewearefightingnow!youknow?
　　Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don''''''''''''''''t forceme!
　　X:Pardon!
　　(Y拿出一袋牛奶)
　　X抢过牛奶:milk, verygood! Ilikedrinkingit. howdoyouknowthat?
　　Y:pleasedrinkit!
　　X喝完牛奶:Thanks, ha,ha
　　Y:Doyoustillwanttokillme?
　　X:Sure, must! milkismilk.
　　Y(恼怒+冷酷):Verygood! verygood! Ihopeyouwillnotforgetwhatyousaid!?
　　X:I’msureIwon’t!
　　Y:Imustgiveyoualesson!IfIdon''''''''''''''''tbeatyourthistime, you’llneverbehaveproperly!3-2-1-0!
　　X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !
　　Y大笑：HaHa……
　　X可怜状: help! help! Whereisthewashroom?
　　Y:What ?
　　X:Toliet?
　　Y:What ?
　　X:The “WC”?
　　Y:Oh,I see ,goalongthisstreetandturnrightwhenyouseeacorssingroad!
　　X:Thanks,byebye.
　　Y掏出纸屑吹:Thisisgenuirnesnow!
　　H:Stop!Protectingtheenvironmentisabasicobligation!
　　Y:Whoareyou?
　　H:Hua---man----lou! Haveyouseenximenchuixue?
　　Y:Yes, hewasbeatenbymeandisin“WC” now,ha……
　　H惊讶:Nowyouarethebestintheworld!
　　Y:Youareright!
　　H:Teriffic!youaretheonemykinglookingfor! doyouwantjoininus?
　　Y:Yes,It’sverygood.
　　H:Ok, followme, Let’sgotoseemyking!
　　Y:Ok,Let’s go!
　　第二幕：无间道
　　H:Mydearest ! letmeintroduce yeguchengtoyou! （指Y） thisisyegucheng.
　　K:sitdownplese, yegucheng.
　　H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Doyouwanttofollowmykingnomatterwhathappenssuchascold headache,sair and aids?
　　Y: Yes,Ido.
　　K: Huamanlou, come . puttheringonhisfinger!（音乐停）
　　X唱着上:Onlyyou……(看到戒子) thisringshouldbemine!
　　K:Butwhoareyou? whyshoulditbelongyou?
　　Y急切: king! dearking!Imustgonow,mybrotherislookingforme!huoxi(维语再见)
　　K:huoxi? Whatdoesthatmean? ItisnotEnglish, isn’t it ?
　　Y:How clever……
　　X冷酷:yegucheng! comehere!Iwanttotellyousomething!
　　Y抱X的腿:oldbrother ! Forgiveme!
　　X:Forgiveme? Why?
　　Y: Oncetherewasachangebeforeme,Ilostit. Ifthegodgivemeantherchance, I’lltellyou“I love you”,Iftheremustbea limited period,Ihopeitisthousandyear!
　

[1] [2] [3] 下一页