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英语搞笑话剧剧本(四人)
作者:佚名   来源:本站整理   更新日期:2012-12-3   浏览次数:

甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie<Avatar>? Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz,  applaud , thank you....Recently, I will direct a new movie called <  Avatar 2  >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famous actress---Anne Hathaway,OK, let's begin. At first , talent show, number one, let's welcome.
乙:(风情万种,妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞吻):oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right? Yeah, I'm Nicole  Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打个响指) come some music.(搞笑舞,自由发挥). (跳完,鞠躬,向观众谢幕), thank you,(面向导演), honey, is it a wonderful performance?
甲:(作目瞪口呆状),
乙:(在甲眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok?
甲:eh...my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.
乙:oh no ...sweet ,you break my heart...(掩面离去)
丙:oh it seems to be serious. God bless me(画个十字架,镇定地走到甲面前,伸出手), nice to meet you, director.
甲:(与之握手),nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please.
丙:I'm Celine Dion, you know, I don't have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and(做沉思状) oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, (同学鼓掌,乙作安抚状),oh, calm down, calm down,it's just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I....
甲:ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin
丙:OK!!! I'll use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.
near, far, wherever you are
i believe that the heart does go on
once more, you opened the door(甲stop stop,丙不理,继续作深情状)
and you're here in my heart,
and my heart will go on and on.
甲:guard ,guard, help, drag this mad woman out.
Oh, I'm dying, hope the next one will give me a surprise
(丁上场)
甲(做厌恶状):oh, it's really a big surprise. What an ugly woman! (Of course, I won’t let you pass.) Why do you come here?
丁: Distinguished director, please give me a chance. I walked 25000km for a year just to compete in this interview. Please give me a chance, please.
甲():OK, so what’s your name?
丁: my name is Gaga Su.
甲(上下打量):EN…ok ok, I’ll give you only 30s. OK?
丁:OK, that’s enough. Thank you, thank you.
  I’ll just present a poem I love best. The Furthest Distance in The World.
The furthest distance in the world 
世界上最遥远的距离
Is not between life and death
不是生与死
But when I stand in front of you
而是 我就站在你面前
Yet you don't know that I love you
你却不知道我爱你
The furthest distance in the world
世界上最遥远的距离
Is not when I stand in front of you
不是 我就站在你面前
Sir, time is out.
甲:Oh, no no no, just go on.
Yet you can't see my love
你却不知道我爱你
But when undoubtedly knowing the love from both
而是 明明知道彼此相爱
Yet cannot be together
却不能在一起
The furthest distance in the world
世界上最遥远的距离
Is not being apart while being in love
不是 明明知道彼此相爱 却不能在一起
But when painly cannot resist the yearning
而是 明明无法抵挡这股思念
Yet pretending you have never been in my heart
却还得故意装作丝毫没有把你放在心里
That’s all, thank you.
(另外两人跑进来,乙妩媚状)
乙:Honey, you like my dance, right?
丙镇静状: Director, you like my singing, right?
丁深情状: Princess, do you like my poem?
甲(沉迷状):。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。I …I…Er..  You…you are so excellent that I decide to adopt you, Number 3.
甲,乙:Oh, no. Why do you choose her?  She is so shabby, and even ugly. We are far better than her. NO, it’s unjust.
甲:Thank you for your performances. But I have to say I learn a lot from her. We can’t judge a person by his appearance, right? She is so talent .One’s appearance can be changed  easily, but one’s intellect could not be built in a day.
So, I have to say sorry to you.
(乙,丙掩面而泣)
(⊙o⊙)THE END!
Thanks for you watching.

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